A Day Late & A Dollar Short.. pt.1

I tried to ignore the shrill ringing off the phone. It was threatening to wake me and it succeeded. I groaned and got up to answer it.

“Yeah?” I shook my head to clear the grogginess.

“Ciobhan.” The male voice on the other end spoke. I cringed. I hoped against all hope I wouldn’t have to speak to him for some time.

“Yup.” I muttered.

“What’s up?” I guess he hadn’t figured out I was ignoring him.

“Nothing. What do you want?” I figured I’d be blunt. (That normally worked.)

“I haven’t seen you in a while, I was wondering if you’re OK.”

“I’m touched. I’ve been busy.” I spoke quickly. I knew my voice had an edge of sarcasm and I didn’t care.

“What’s wrong? You ok?” He picked up, how smart.

“I’m fine Janssen. Listen, I really don’t need a babysitter.” I hung up. Hopefully, he’d take the hint and leave me alone. My phone rang again. I closed my eyes and sighed deeply. I knew it was him, so I didn’t even bother to answer. I went back to bed and buried myself under the covers. I needed to sleep. I’d been so tired lately, even with the regular eight hours those stupid doctors recommended, I was still yawning on my feet every day.

Five minutes later, there was a knock on my door. I groaned. If it was Janssen, I’d shit, I don’t know what I would do. I haven’t spoken to him since three weeks ago. The knock on the door persisted. I got up and opened it. Sure enough, Mr. Debonair was standing on the other side. I made to close the door in his face and he stopped me.

“What do you want Janssen?” I said angrily, I placed my body in the doorway, I couldn’t push the door any further nor could he come inside.

"What is with the attitude, Ciobhan? You’ve been bitchin’ for a while. What's wrong with you?” he asked.

“Kiss my ass Janssen, and leave me alone.” I tried to push the door close. He stopped me. I bit my lip and glared at him angrily.

“No. See I don’t know what the f*** is your problem, but you’re obviously taking it out on me. Now unless you tell me what has your drawers in a bunch, stop bitching at me.” He seemed angrier by the second. I wasn't fazed. I just stood and glared at him.

“My problem? Fine, I’ll tell you. You. Satisfied?” I said to him, my voice flat.

“What?”

I crossed my hands over my chest and looked at him. Did this dude think I really was that stupid? What am I? A blonde? I bit my lip in anger.

“Listen. I don’t need for you to mess me up any more than I already am. Yeah I liked you, we messed around a few times, that’s all it was. A good f***. But when your black ass turns around and starts messing with Lissa, especially knowing how our relationship is, that’s messed up.” I watched his reaction. Confusion, anger, frustration, defeat; they all flashed across his face in a matter of seconds. I really wanted to hear what his response would be. Then again, I didn’t.

“I have to go to work. Leave.” I said to him.

“Ciobhan, how long have you known me?” he said.

“Oh please, don’t even try that. We’re friends. I listened to you bitch about what’s-her-face messing with your feelings; I know you got my back; but I’m not going to believe every lie you ever told me. I almost believed you when you said you wanted us to get together. I let my pussy think for me instead of my head and that almost got me in trouble. Now please, do me a favour, let me live with whatever amount of dignity I have left to deal with my life. I have to go to work.” I pushed him out the doorway and closed my door.

I walked to the bathroom, my legs shaking. I barely made it to the toilet when I threw up. I sat on the floor of the bathroom for a few minutes, before I remembered I had to go to work. I groaned, got up and showered.

After I got dressed, I grabbed a bottle of orange juice from the freezer, locked my apartment door and walked to my car. I tensed when I saw him standing beside it.

“Are you ever going to listen to me?” he said watching me walk to the driver’s side.

“What for? So you can lie again? I’ll save you the trouble. Forget it.” I got in my car and drove away.

At the store, I clocked in and went to my desk. Nycole hadn’t gotten in yet. I cursed as I remembered I was supposed to pick her up. I took out my cell-phone and dialed her number when I saw her walk in, phone in hand.

“You better have a good reason for forgetting me.” She snapped. I followed her to the worker’s lounge and sat down. She looked at my face and immediately softened.

“You look like you’re about to cry. It’s ok. I got here fine, just took me longer, but I got here. Don’t cry. If they ask me why I’m late I’m blaming it on you though.”
How could I tell her why I was crying? She’d just say ‘I told you so’ and walk off to work. I sighed. “I’m just tired, is all.”

“Come on. The earlier we get working, the more hours we get paid for.” She grinned and pushed me out the doors. The next four hours before lunch were hell. Janssen kept calling the office, but I was always too busy or not at my counter. Then he came by the store and sat in the waiting area. He’d never approach but he never left. Nycole was becoming suspicious. Janssen and I were usually alright. Never a dull moment, and two of the most stubborn people she’d ever met. She had warned me not to get close to him, because she knew how he was, but I guess my libido and my mind had other plans in mind. Shit happens.
At 11:30, he left. I sighed in relief and went to the back room to use the bathroom. A few of my co-workers had gone on break and were eating lunch. I caught one whiff of a double-whopper and wanted to barf. I went to the restroom, did my business and brushed my teeth. When I came out, Nycole was standing at the door, her hands crossed on her chest and that look on her face.

“What the hell is going on?” she said. She was younger than me, but she was a whole lot taller.

“What do you mean?” I asked, running my fingers through my hair.

“Janssen has been here all day, but you haven't spoken to him. He’s been calling all morning - you haven't spoken to him. Now he’s outside standing beside your car, and you’re in here throwing up. Run your fingers through your hair one more time and I will knock you over.” She said without taking a breath. I put my hands by my side.
I looked out the restroom to the lounge behind, my co-workers ignorant to our argument. Then I looked Nycole square in the eyes.

“We had a fight.” I said slowly.

“So? Don’t you guys always quarrel?” she shrugged.

“This was more than that. I got fed up with the lies and confronted him about it.” I braced myself for her reaction.

“See, I knew this would happen. One of you would get too attached to this foolishness and be unable to handle it. How the hell are you going to get yourself out of this now?” she narrowed her eyes at me.

From behind her I saw someone lift a burger and I wanted to throw up again. I turned and went back to the cubicle.

“Ciobhan, did you get your period yet?” Nycole asked.

I froze. In my head I tried to calculate the days of the month and realized my period hadn’t come when it was supposed to, or three weeks later. I didn’t really have a normal cycle but my it was usually on time.

“F***.” my voice came muffled from the bathroom.

“You shouldn't have been doing that, thats what got you into this in the first place. Come on.” Nycole took my hand and walked with me outside the doors. Janssen got up when we exited the store and walked over to us. She felt me tense.

“You, come with us.” Nycole said. Janssen looked over at me, I ignored him, now I really didn’t want to see him.

“Where are we going?" he asked. I remained silent.

“We are going to the pharmacy.” Nycole said and silenced him with a look. I thanked her for that silently, and I cursed her too.

At the pharmacy, Nycole marched me over to buy a home pregnancy kit. Janssen looked at me. I refused to look at him, but I could feel his eyes boring into my back. I bought the kit, walked back to the store and to the restroom, ignoring both Janssen and Nycole on the way. What was I going to do if I were pregnant?

The few minutes waiting for that test was hell. I sat on a chair, my back straight, and my eyes steady on the window out to where the customers sat waiting to be dealt with. When Nycole came over to me, she was quiet. I looked at her.

“I want to go home.” I spoke in a monotone, afraid to even ask. She nodded.

She told our supervisor I was coming down with something - (yea, a baby is something!) and she was driving me home. Outside, Janssen was still standing beside my car. I groaned and walked over.

“You know I never realized exactly how stubborn you were. What the hell is wrong with you? Don’t you have better things to do than to hang around me all day?” I seethed.

“Ciobhan, I need to talk to you.” Janssen looked even more serious than Nycole. I cut my eyes at him and went around to open my car door. Nycole stopped me and took the keys from me.

“Get in the back, Janssen you drive.” She threw him the keys.

“What’s wrong with her?” he asked, looking at Nycole helping me in the backseat. She came in and made me lay my head in her lap.

“Just drive home Janssen, we’ll talk when we get there.”

At my apartment, Lissa was home. I sat on my bed, pulling off my loafers. Janssen sat on the sofa, looking at me.

“Quit staring at me,” I snapped at him.

“Then tell me what’s wrong.”

I laughed harshly. “Didn’t you hear what I said this morning?”

“Tell me whats the matter.” He said, getting up to help me to take my jacket off. I shrugged away and glared at him.

“What? You never stopped me from helping you when you were sick before, so why now?” he said angrily.

“What’s going on?” Lissa came out of her room.

“Great. Join the party. No, wait. I’ll leave. You guys have fun.” I got up, and fainted. Right into Janssen’s arms.

When I came to, Nycole was sitting beside me, stroking my hair. I gave my eyes a chance to adjust to the light and they focused on Janssen. I moaned. I tried to sit up.

“Hell no, don’t you dare try to get up.” Nycole said sternly.

“What happened?” I put my hand to my head and moaned again. “Why do I hear a jackhammer?”

“You fainted. Right into Janssen’s welcoming arms.” Lissa said. I looked at her; she was sitting on the armrest on the other side of the sofa, looking smug.

“Are you pregnant Ciobhan?” she asked bluntly. I looked over at her. Was I? I looked at Nycole. She nodded. I groaned again. Now what?

“Whose is it?” she asked.

“I’ve only been screwing one person for the past year. Guess who?” I seethed at her.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Janssen said.

“I never knew until today. Besides, what do you care?” I snapped at him. I wanted to hurt him, and I did. He cringed at my remark, and I felt a pang of guilt. I quickly pushed it away.

“That’s cold. We’ve been friends long enough; I thought you knew me by now.” He said his voice flat. He was right. He was a nice guy. And a good friend. But he was also one of those guys my mother warned me about.

“What are you going to do?” Nycole asked. I looked outside my window. What was I going to do? I never really looked at my life with a child in it. I was 22, senior in university, with a bank account that could barely sustain me, yet alone me and a child. I was working my way through university during the summer and it took all my mother had to support me and my younger brother and sister in prep school.

“Are you going to keep it?” Lissa asked me.

“Do I have a say in this?” Janssen said angrily.

I opened my mouth to retort and Nycole silenced me, “It is his child too.” I looked at him, his face taut. I looked away and nodded.

“What will you do about school? Are you crazy? You can’t attend pregnant.” Lissa said. The white girl was acting more blonde by the minute and it was pissing me off.

“I have had just about enough of you.” I snapped at her and stood up. She jumped. “I’ve gone through the past few weeks getting the silent treatment from you. F*** you. You always said you were my friend, yet you are the biggest hypocrite of all. You knew I liked Drew and you just went ahead and played him; screwed him behind my back. I got over that and moved on. Then I told you I had feelings for Janssen and what did you do? You screwed him too. I’m gonna need you to hear me loud right about now - get out of my apartment. I don’t give a damn what you wanna say, where you gonna go, or who you going to; but I’ve had just about enough of your bullshit. Just get the f*** out.”
I had every right to be mad.

I looked at Janssen. “You think I didn’t know huh? You're the same one who told me that I should be a detective, remember? Nothing goes past me? How’d it go? Did you seduce her the same way you did me?” I glared at him.

“Or did you just go ahead and throw your jacked up, skinny vagina in his face? Skinny women are evil. Do you really hate me that much?” I turned on Lissa.

“Hey, I’m skinny too.” Nycole protested. I glared at her. She tried to put a hand on my shoulder and I stopped her.

“I’m tired of people thinking I’m a dumb or too stupid to realize all the mess in my life. Now I’m pregnant by a man who’d put his dick in any woman that came his way, and dissed by someone who I actually called a friend. Whatever the hell else could go wrong?” My eyes blazed.

“I’m leaving. Y’all have fun.” I got up and grabbed the car keys from the table. Nycole tried to stop me again and I shoved her hand away. I held up my hands to stop Janssen from coming towards me. “I don’t need to hear or see you right about now so get out of my way.”
Where I was going I had no idea but I left.

I drove, my head full of thoughts yet I could not think. I parked the car at the park and sat on the hood. I sat there by myself for a few minutes trying to sift through the mass of thoughts in my head. I was annoyed, angry, tired, scared ... I didn’t know what my next move would be, and I was literally too scared to even call my mother. I’d let her down, and although I knew she’d forgive me, that was still no excuse for what she’d say or do when I told her.